Desertion Read online

  Desertion

  A Knights Rebels MC Novel

  River Savage

  Contents

  Copyright

  Dedication

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Chapter 17

  Chapter 18

  Chapter 19

  Chapter 20

  Chapter 21

  Chapter 22

  Chapter 23

  Chapter 24

  Chapter 25

  Chapter 26

  Chapter 27

  Chapter 28

  Chapter 29

  Chapter 30

  Chapter 31

  Chapter 32

  Chapter 33

  Chapter 34

  Chapter 35

  Chapter 36

  Chapter 37

  Chapter 38

  Chapter 39

  Chapter 40

  Epilogue

  Also by River Savage

  Coming Soon By River Savage

  HELP SOMEONE. HELP YOURSELF.

  Acknowledgments

  About the Author

  DESERTION

  ©2015

  First eBook edition: July 2015

  Desertion is a work of fiction. All characters, organizations and events portrayed in this novel are either products of the author’s imagination or used fictitiously.

  All rights reserved. In accordance with the U.S. Copyright Act of 1976, the scanning, uploading and sharing of any part of this book without the permission of the publisher is unlawful piracy and theft of the author’s intellectual property. Thank you for your support of the author’s rights.

  Edited by Becky Johnson, Hot Tree Editing

  Cover design ©: Louisa Maggio at LM Creations

  Image: Mofatt Photography

  Model: Troy Scott

  Information address: [email protected]

  There are the men and women whom we should honor everyday for what they do for our countries.

  Thank you.

  One

  Jesse

  “What’s the first thing you’re going to do, Staff Sergeant?” Corporal Jefferies asks from the back of the Humvee as our convoy makes its way back to base. We just did our last patrol through the city of Kandahar. We've been in Afghanistan for the last six months, six long fucking months and this time next week, we will be heading home. I fucking hate this place, the polluted air, the death, the injustice; it all clouds my judgment.

  “Gonna find my ass in the first diner I can find, ordering one of everything off the menu.”

  “Of course you are.” Corporal Conner smirks beside me, knowing how much I love a good fucking meal. “I, on the other hand, am gonna bury myself in a tight pussy for days.” He groans and I can’t help but grin at the fucker. “Jesus, I can’t wait. What about you, Jefferies, you ready to see your girl?” Conner continues after radioing our coordinates.

  “Got a Dear John from her last week,” Jefferies says, wiping the smile off my face. Fuck.

  “Fuck, man, that’s rough,” Conner curses and it’s better than what I would say. Fucking bitch.

  “Yeah, think she’s been fucking around. Says she needs some time to think.” I shake my head at the fucked-up situation my friend found himself in.

  “Well, fuck her. Fuck her and her timing,” Conner says, his eyes still facing the front, still checking our surroundings.

  “Yeah, I really thought she was the one for me,” Jefferies says, and I have to hand it to him, the fucker’s been holding out on us, didn’t see it coming at all. Though if I had a woman back home and the bitch sent me a Dear John, I wouldn’t fucking share. Don’t give a fuck how close I am with these fuckers.

  “Got some movement at nine o’clock. Stay alert.” The vehicle’s military radio crackles with the convoy leader’s report. I sit a little straighter as the warning comes through.

  “Fuck, what’s that? What’s that?” Jefferies’ curses, eyes finding something ahead. I follow his direction and see movement over the ridge.

  “Nine o’clock, get on the fifty,” I shout to Jefferies as the first gunshot hits our truck.

  “I’ve got—” Conner’s voice repeats our coordinates down the radio but it drowns out as a piercing sound explodes in my ears. A series of flashes break out, distorting my vision before a force hits us, lifting and spreading the horrendous blow of the explosion through the Humvee.

  “We’re taking heavy fire!” Jefferies shouts, but my ears feel like they’re stuffed with cotton wool.

  “Fuck, keep moving, keep moving,” Jefferies’ voice echoes through the ringing, but Conner’s frozen. Guns drilling, shots thumping, and heart racing, time spins past me as my world breaks down into slow motion. A second explosion to our right shakes us; the ringing in my ears turns into a high-pitched squeal.

  “Oh, fuck!” Conner’s panicked voice hits me and I find myself comforting him.

  “We’re good, Conner. Get it together. Stay sharp,” I say, watching team two push forward after taking most of the hit. The thick smoke in the air makes everything murky, my senses are on edge, like this is just the beginning.

  “RPG, move, move, move,” Jefferies’ shouts and then moves as fast as he can.

  “Conner, fucking move or die—” I don’t finish my sentence before the road before us comes up out of the ground, a volcano of orange sand erupts before our eyes, flipping the Humvee up. Yelling fills the air. The realization we’ve been hit takes a minute to register as my body lays distorted in the wreckage of the Humvee. Everything becomes numb. Muffled sounds of gunshots echo around the gnarled vehicle and orders break through.

  “Conner,” I shout again, but I don’t even know if he survived.

  “Ahhh!” A scream pulls me from the darkness.

  “Conner?” I begin to move, but my foot is wedged between two pieces of metal. Everything shifts as the world comes back to focus. Screaming breaks through the numbness, and the pain radiating through my body anchors me to my spot.

  “My fucking leg! I can’t feel my leg, Sarge. It’s fucking gone!”

  I twist to get my eyes on him, but pull back when I see his leg hanging at an unnatural angle.

  “You’re gonna be okay, Conner,” I shout over the sounds of attack, over the sounds of his screams, praying and hoping my words can calm him.

  “I’m gonna fucking die. I’m gonna fucking die.”

  We’re stuck in the kill zone. I don’t fucking know if we’re going to be okay, if we’re going to survive, but I can’t tell him that.

  “Motherfucker.” My body jolts awake at the sound of Conner’s words. Fuck, not this fucking dream again.

  “Jesse?” A warm hand touches my shoulder, and instantly, I’m on alert. Twisting my body, I reach out and grab the owner of the voice by the neck as the steady beat of their pulse thumps beneath my fingertips. It takes me a few deep breathes to realize I’m not back in Afghanistan, but at home, in my bed. The young woman’s throat I have my fingers wrapped around is not the enemy, but the bitch I took to bed.

  “Fuck, sorry, sweetheart.” I release my grip and my eyes move to her throat, watching it constrict as she drags a large breath through her mouth.

  “What the hell, Jesse?” She holds her neck, wheezing past her words. I rub my face in an attempt to erase the memories of the dream. Memories which can’t be un-seen.

  “You okay?” I finally look up. Her dark hair covers her face,
so I can’t see how scared she is. Not that this bothers me; their faces mean nothing to me. All I care about is fucking them and watching them leave.

  “Yeah, but I should go.” She moves to the edge of the bed, the soft light from my bathroom highlights the arch of her back. Fuck, she has an amazing body. Shifting my body closer to hers, my finger reaches out and follows the curve. I should let her go. Having her in my bed is a bad fucking idea. I should never let them stay for this reason, but the fucked-up part of me doesn’t want to be alone. Even if I did just try to strangle her.

  “What was the dream about?” She stops her retreat and turns to look at me. I roll back over and pull her to me. My hunger to get lost in a tight pussy builds, and the more questions she asks, my need to bury the past grows stronger

  “Less talk and more fucking, sweetheart.” I take her mouth and instantly she molds to me. I fucking love bitches like this. It helps me deal with the fucked-up shit I’ve done. The fucked-up shit I’ve seen. It might not be the right therapy, but it’s my only therapy.

  “Put your hands around my neck again.” Whatever-her-name-is demands as I slide on the third condom of the night.

  “You want me to strangle you while I fuck you?”

  “Yes,” she moans and my cock aches in anticipation. Fucking hell yes.

  Jesus. I’m so fucked up. I even manage to find bitches who love my kind of fucked up.

  Two

  BELL

  “Damn, girl, you are getting looks tonight.” My best friend Lissy bumps her shoulder into mine as we stand at the bar waiting for our drinks. I look around the club and feel myself sink into my own skin, wishing she wouldn’t put any ideas in my head. I hate the thought of people looking at me.

  “I’m pretty sure it’s you they’re looking at.” I look down at her painted-on jeans and skintight top, and hold back my eye roll. The woman is kidding herself if she thinks these men are looking at me over her.

  “That’s because you don’t know how amazing you are, Bell.” I return her smile but don’t comment. It’s best this way. It’s always this way with Lissy and me. She thinks I’m beautiful and I think she is crazy.

  “So what did you tell your mom you were doing tonight?” She hands the bartender a fifty with a wink. He beams a white tooth smile back, which only pushes her dimples to come out to play. She turns back to me, grinning like a fool, and I shake my head. Oh, to be carefree like Lissy. If only I had her attitude.

  “Bell?” Lissy presses, flipping her long red curls over her shoulder and narrowing her eyes on me.

  “I told them I was at your house for the night.” I swallow past the bad taste left in my mouth from my lies. I don’t like lying to my mom, but if I want to live some kind of normal life, or as normal as I can live with a mother like mine, a lie will have to suffice.

  “You know this whole situation is ridiculous, right, Bell?” We take our drinks and move back to the table where our friends wait.

  “Don’t start tonight, Lissy,” I beg, handing Manda, my other best friend, her drink before taking a seat.

  “What is she starting tonight?” Manda’s twin sister, Kate, asks as she takes her drink from Lissy.

  “Bell told her mom we were having a sleepover,” Lissy spills and I have to stop myself from kicking her under the table. Lissy has been my best friend since high school. She might think what she is doing is looking out for me, but she’s not. She doesn’t get my situation. I wouldn’t want her to either; but where Lissy is strong, confident and loud, I’m shy, reserved and quiet. I can’t just tell my parents I’m done playing their rules and then not care if they don’t agree. It’s different for her. For all of them.

  “Guys, can we not go there tonight?” I look over at Kate and I pray she has my back. Kate is more like me—happy to keep the peace—but most of the time will come to my defense.

  “We’re just worried.” Manda gives her opinion and now I know I’m in trouble. Once Manda weighs in, there is no stopping the rest of them.

  “I know, guys, but what do you expect me to do?” I ask a little too loudly. I look around making sure no one is watching us.

  I wasn’t expecting to come out tonight. But Lissy and Manda insisted we go out for my birthday. I thought we were talking about movies and dinner. Not Liquid, the hottest nightclub in Rushford. I’m way out of my league here and my girls know it.

  “You can start by telling your parents you’re not your sister. You can’t live in her shadow for the rest of your life. You’re twenty-three years old for Christ’s sake, Bell.” Lissy shakes her head, working herself up. I know she means well, all my friends do, but it’s easy for them to say. They don’t live with what I live with every day. Feeling my mood get dragged down, I force myself to take a breath and let the ugly feelings, which always appear when talking about my sister, wash over me.

  “Guys, it’s Bell’s night. Let’s not go there,” Kate comes to my rescue, finally. I smile over at her, a silent thank you, but it’s too late; Lissy has already gone there, and once she starts, then there’s no stopping her.

  “We’re just worried,” she begins, but I can’t let her get to me, not tonight.

  “Excuse me.” I stand from my chair needing to escape. I know when they tell me they are worried they mean it. I get it. I do, but my situation is something I can’t control. I can’t control that one of my sisters is missing, taken from us without a trace, and in turn, my mother keeps me on a tight leash. Nor can I explain how I allow it all to happen. When it comes to my family, I can’t say no or bring them disappointment, because if I do, I’ll only bring more pain. To everyone involved.

  “Don’t leave. We didn’t mean anything by it.” Manda reaches out and takes my wrist, dragging me back down. I take another breath and calm myself.

  “Well, what did you mean?” I ask, my confidence shaken by the truth of their concerns.

  “Bell, we just want what’s best for you.” Lissy takes my other hand and I don’t pull away. I need her strength to stop myself from breaking down.

  “I don’t expect you to understand, guys, because if I’m honest, sometimes I don’t understand. But I do expect you to respect my wishes. My family might not be conventional but they’re the only one I have.” I take another breath, my attempt to calm down is failing. I hate that this is what it comes to when we talk about my family, or bring up Paige. I hate that I can’t live a normal life like them, but I can’t change the past. I can’t move on. I’m stuck. Stuck in a nightmare of what my life has become. And when they bring it all up again, I’m reminded just how screwed up the situation is.

  “I’m sorry, girl.” Lissy squeezes my hand again when she notices the tears start to come. “I shouldn’t have pushed.” I nod and accept her apology. The last thing we need tonight is a fight over Paige.

  “It’s okay. Can we just drop it?” I ask, hoping we can get back to where we were.

  “Back to birthday drinks.” Kate nods, following my lead. I deliver a press-on smile and point it at my friends. It feels wrong, but I have to do what I have to do.

  “Good evening, ladies,” the smooth sound of a male voice brings the table’s conversation to a halt and I’m thankful for the reprieve so I can compose myself. “I just wanted to come over and say hi.” Something makes me freeze. I know that voice.

  Lissy drops my hand while Manda’s grip tightens, her eyes bugging out at the owner of the familiar voice coming from behind me. Something about it resonates within me but I can’t quite put my finger on it. I take another deep breath and discreetly try to wipe my eyes.

  “Hi.” Lissy extends her hand across the table first, and from the corner of my eye, a tanned arm reaches out and takes hers.

  “Are you enjoying yourselves tonight, ladies?” Mystery Voice asks and I watch my friends’ faces light up at his question. I could just turn around and see where I know it from, but I know my face will be red from my rant only a few moments ago.

  “Well, it’s our girl’s birthday.”
Manda points to me and my body slides down in my chair. They are about to throw me under the bus with this guy, and I’m so not ready for this.

  “Oh, is it?” Mystery Voice asks, his voice unbelievably sexy, and I force myself not to turn from pure stubbornness. My friends all nod, smiling up at him. Jesus, I can’t believe these girls. “And does the birthday girl have a name?” His hand rests on the back of my chair, and I feel his warmth teasing my skin. I refuse to look, even if my body wants to turn, but after a nudge from Manda, and an enthusiastic nod from Lissy, I slowly turn and catch the bluest eyes I’ve ever seen. Bluest eyes I have seen before.

  “You.” I slump in my chair when his grin takes over his face. Why did it have to be him? Jesse Carter. Knights Rebels MC crew member. Sexy, dangerous, and if I’m being honest, funny as all hell. I barely know the man, but he gets under my skin like no other.

  “I knew it was you, Nurse Bell.” He winks then pulls up a chair next to me, inviting himself into our circle.

  “You know each other?” Kate asks, looking from me to Jesse.

  “No,” I reply, folding my arms over my chest. I mean I know him, but not know him, know him.

  “Yes.” Jesse knocks my shoulder with his larger frame and I nearly fall out of my chair. “Oh, shit, sorry.” His fingers wrap around my arm, pulling me back and stopping me from falling. I try to tug out of his grasp when he rights me in my chair, but his hold is too strong.

  “Let go,” I hiss, searching for a spot on his face I can dislike. It’s a hard task when the man is this damn good looking.

  Too good looking.

  His disheveled blond hair is a long, overgrown mess, but somehow, he still makes it look good. Maybe it’s the tanned skin, or the smile that always takes over his face, but if you were to look at him from his shoulders up, he looks like he belongs in a magazine. But then he has to go and open his mouth and ruin my lust filled craze.

  Jesse Carter is crass, foul mouthed and paired with his dangerous body and the fact he is in a biker gang, the man is serious bad-boy territory. From his tactless lines, to the way he wears his Rebels’ cut, Jesse spells trouble. Trouble I don’t need, especially when just looking at him has my cheeks flaring with warmth. I’m a fumbling child when I’m around him and after the few times I have been in his presence, I seem to get worse.